I am here, and you are here on my page, to tell you that you cannot have everything you want or everything you think you can have, that there are limits and we must choose. I am here to tell you that everything in life is about choices, and the consequences of these choices. I am here, and you are here on my page, to tell you that you cannot function endlessly without rest, and if you don't slow down in time, you will be slowed down anyway, either by illness or by something else, even more dramatic than a personal illness... I worked so much without a break in my years of entrepreneurship, and even skipped sleep - yes, I did that too, that I wasn't even surprised when I received the biggest personal brake in terms of health: a heart condition that knocked me down and nearly knocked me out completely, and that has dramatically limited what I can and cannot do for the rest of my life. It slowed me down automatically... I am here, and you are here on my personal page, to tell you that at one point I was slowed down by Him from my rush through work and problems through the death of my best friend (a friend of 25 years, a lifetime of friendship, and a friendship closer than a family relationship, as there are few people you can call at 2 in the morning and know they'll help you with anything you need, and won't back down from anything)... in a car accident at 1 in the morning, coming home tired from his work, commuting between two cities, sleeping only 4 hours a night, the smartest IT guy ever, 33 years old and the kindest-hearted person I've ever met except for my dad), he was about to get married and start a shop and slow down the pace... In that order. He didn't get to do anything anymore, because he was slowed down completely, permanently, because he didn't slow down in time... Because he didn't sleep and rest enough, because he worked like crazy to achieve his earthly dreams (our small human and earthly dreams, which we believe are a big deal but really aren't... not even one of our earthly and human dreams, no matter how big they may seem, has any of the grandeur we attribute to them….

If someone holds an opposing view, as I mentioned, everyone is free to have their own opinion, but I will only listen to some of them, as there are certain opinions that hold no weight, opinions "of ashes," because they concern things that can't be seen from certain angles or through certain lenses. Some opinions are “unqualified”). After John died, I wrote that journal-like page where I confessed to a friend that one day, soon after his death, maybe the second or third day, I set everything aside (note: I was having then serious, significant problems in my second business), and spent ten precious minutes with my little boy, completely immersed in his world of toy cars and trains, and I don't remember exactly what we did then, but I know that in those precious minutes, I was entirely his, fully present in that moment with him, fully connected with my little boy. John's death, so painful, taught me to look at my precious one with different eyes, to detach myself completely in order to be with him, connected to his world... Dear Mom, if you're still more connected to the world's external problems, I want to tell you to slow down NOW, before it's too late. We have our children for 18 years, if we even have them for that long. Some are blessed to have them for a lifetime, many years, others don't even get that much; I know stories like that, but I won't go into them. I saw a wonderful mommy on Instagram the other day, who posted her skincare routine with her beautiful little boy. She said she realized a bit late that she could do it very well together with him... It brought tears to my eyes to see her doing it, and I told her ... :) I too sometimes “steal” joys like this, with my son... Not skincare, but I ask him about video editing or teach him a thing or two about business, even though his current passion is computers...

But for several years now, I don't spend summers with my precious son, don't ask me why, as I can't go into details. And for almost two months every year, my heart breaks with longing until autumn comes and he returns to me, each time a bit older, a bit more grown up. I realize that I've missed yet another precious summer, because now he goes back to school, which somewhat wipes the happiness from his face, and I often see his grumpy morning face or his tired evening face. But I know that if I didn't allow him to spend summers where he does, I would be the one erasing his smile and his greatest joy from his face, and I can't do that. So, I hurt my heart every year, every summer, without my precious son by my side for many years now... It breaks my soul...

But now, I must think only about seeing him soon, even if he's grumpy because school is starting, and I shouldn't dwell on what I've lost, because what's lost is lost... Moms, every precious moment with your child is more valuable than the purest gold, and you have moments NOW that will never come back... I have a friend whose children have all flown the nest, and there were many; now, her nest is empty. She's been left a widow, though she's young, just about nine years older than me. Her home used to be full of children and full of joy, and now it's empty... I can't imagine the size of the void she must feel, as her children have gone far away, thousands of kilometers distant... Mom who posted on Instagram about your twins and your shopping for shoes, buying two pairs at once... If you only knew how blessed you are to have those little feet of children for whom you're buying shoes that might hurt your wallet... I know what it's like to feel a sting in your wallet because of their shoes… But a few more years will pass, and you'll long for your children so much, and you'll want to take them with you to buy little shoes, but your children will be gone, and you'll have too much unspent money in your wallet... Yes, I know, I have a deep sensitivity to this, but tell me, isn't it true? Don't our children leave us too quickly? I wished to have many, many children, but I remarried when my son was between 7 and 8 years old, and I couldn't have another child... The dream of having 8 children is gone, the dream of siblings for my son is gone, but I still have the most precious dream: I still have my son. I have something special in my heart for mothers, and even more so for mothers with many children: I melt completely. Before I had my son, I had a daughter, but she passed away. Her death influenced my first marriage’s failure, although not just that.

In any case, a noteworthy fact is that the baby girl died a week after birth, and I had been still at work, at my business, at 8 in the evening when my water broke and we had to rush to the hospital to give birth... My first husband later accused me that it was because of me that the baby girl died, that I didn't slow down the pace... I don't know if that's true or not... But I know I didn't slow down the pace... And to be completely honest, even now, it's sometimes very difficult for me to slow down the pace, like right now, in this exact period, with so many things that need to be done... yesterday and that put an immense pressure on me, from which I feel I need to break free, or else it suffocates me... I wrote a bit in the Technique of Consciousness Flow, more than just a support blog for business, but maybe I needed it too, and so did you. I wanted to emphasize strongly one thing: if you accelerate the pace of life and work and keep it continuously like that, you will eventually end up being automatically slowed down, either by illness or something else, you can lose someone very dear and realize that you haven't given that person all the time and attention they deserved and which would have nourished both you and them, and instead, you let yourself be emptied once through your own frantic rush through life, and a second time through that loss. But if you slow down NOW, THERE IS STILL TIME NOW, IT'S NOT TOO LATE YET. But it's NOW, not tomorrow. Tomorrow is not ours. Whoever believes it is, is sorely mistaken or deluding themselves. If you slow down now, you can still enjoy life, there is still time, and by enjoying life, I don't mean the (senseless and frivolous) parties I attended a lot in my youth and now would remove from my list, that's not what I mean by enjoying life. If the things in your life even slightly resemble my story, then it's time for you to SLOW DOWN FAST. Your face will shine, yes, from the wonderful and effective facial care oils and creams, but your soul will shine much brighter because you've stopped your chase and started to receive the joys that were given to you for free.

Slow down, glow up. That's all I had to say for now, and that's what I wanted to clarify.

Thank you for reading my story!!

I see businesses - entrepreneurship - as a means to create and help, to provide people with services and goods they can use, either by continually creating or by innovating, improving on something that has already been proposed or done. I don't view money as a goal, but rather as a secondary outcome of a venture or intervention. If money itself is a goal for someone (in the sense of The Big Goal), then I see a significant issue there. There's much to discuss within the limits of this blog post, but I don't say this in judgment, as I've been there too. I once believed that making money was a meritorious goal in life. I'll probably address this topic separately in another context. Money is merely a tool and should never be the ultimate goal.

I chose to create and work in my own business for the creative freedom it brought and still brings me, although my choice has come at a significant cost in my life. As much as I love entrepreneurship, I would give anything, if I could, to turn back time and focus on what is now the most important thing on Earth to me after being with Him: to spend more time with my child. I can't turn back time, and I don't want to dwell too much on those moments when my child was little, around 3 or 4 years old, and he would come to me and say, "Mommy, stay with me a little and a lot, please, Mommy, stay with me a little and a lot..." During that time, I was deeply involved in the challenges of my entrepreneurship and many things that weren't easy. I couldn't give my dear little boy all the attention he deserved, he - my joy. However, I remember having a passing thought that someday I would deeply regret not being able to give him more of the attention he deserved, and that I would be one day the one asking him to "stay with mommy a little and a lot..." That time is (almost) here, and it's very painful, even these brackets are painful: try to interpret them. I can't turn back time... How I wish I could! But I know that for other mothers and fathers, it's even more painful, perhaps because the departure of their children from their sides is much more difficult, maybe even permanent...

I still can cherish this "last hundred meters of land." My little boy is now a teenager, over fifteen years old, and he doesn't want to spend as much time with mommy anymore. He's into computer games with his friends, and on the street, he doesn't feel comfortable with mommy anymore. He doesn't want to take pictures anymore... I can rarely give him a kiss... I really wanted to homeschool him, considering my background in education, I studied for two years the aspect of homeschooling him, but in the end, he didn't want to, mainly because having classmates and friends at school validated him, and he needed that... I haven't slowed down enough in time. I haven't slowed down enough in time to fill my soul with the joy of childhood months. Now, I would go back in time and relive every second, start over, fill every past second with joy and happiness Just Because I'm With My Son... I let the seconds of the past cast a shadow over my joys at the time. I let the pains, worries, and problems of that time cast a shadow over my joys back then. When I was in the past, I lived in the future, and when the future caught up with me, I wish so much I could go back in time...

I let the dreams of that time and false dreams steal the present moment. I chased the wind, and when I opened my fists, it was too late. They were empty. The dearest dream is about to leave the nest empty soon, ready to take flight... My story is much longer than this, this is just a drop from it. And I didn't even think the time had come to tell it, even this bit... Sometimes, it's better to learn and help others learn from scars, not from open wounds. In my case, there are still open wounds, not just a few, and not light ones. It's not the time or place for all of it here, but I had to say it, had to tell you the story of chasing the wind and opening empty fists...

Slow down the pace of life, decelerate... While there's still time, before it's too late... Yes, I wrote in my business slogan and in my Instagram bio that slowing down leads to shining, to radiance... But it has two meanings:

One of them is that you slow down a bit to take care of your skin, which will shine, the other one is about inner radiance, which comes from stopping the mad rush of life, slowing down, and finding joy or still finding joy in what's most precious, what can't be bought with money...

My business is just a business, merely a tool, even though sometimes I enjoy it immensely, even though sometimes it exhausts me beyond measure. It's just a business, just a tool... My small online store is a tiny dream I had a while ago and now I'm fulfilling it, but it's not more valuable than what I still hold precious in my life on this Earth, the gifts from God in my life: my family, and most importantly, my child... My skincare and body care products are wonderful, some are fabulous, as I've mentioned before. They're natural, they respect human health and well-being, they respect nature and the planet, they're "clean," and they're phenomenally effective in their action on the skin, some even on a deeper level. Some are the result of years of research, and some are valuable innovations. But they're still... tools. And a tool is never and cannot be placed above the one it serves.